Dumb Blondes Jokes

Q:What do you call an intelligent blonde?
A:A Golden Retriever.

Q: How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: You don't. They're born that way.

Q: How does a blonde interpret 6.9?
A: A 69 interrupted by a period.

Q: What do you call a brunette standing between two blondes?
A: An interpreter.

Q. What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
A. Pregnant!

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?
A: Because it said "Concentrate."

Q: How can you tell if a fax came from a blonde?
A: It has a stamp on it.

Q: Why do blondes have "TGIF" on their shoes?
A: Toes go in first.

Q: Why shouldn't blondes have coffee breaks?
A: It takes too long to retrain them.

Q: How do you put a twinkle in a blonde's eye?
A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.

Dumb Blonde

"Poor blondes, they get all the funny cartoons about them."

LOL

Pregnancy FAQ

The following is a list of some common questions that we have been asked by teenagers. Please read through the list of questions to see if any are similar to your own.

1. Can I get pregnant the first time I have sex?
You can get pregnant any time you have sex – the first time, the fifth time, or the tenth time. It doesn’t matter how many times you have sex, it is possible to get pregnant.

2. I haven’t started having periods yet. Can I have sex without worrying about getting pregnant?
Generally, women ovulate 10-14 days before they start their period – this is the most fertile time during the month. Bcause you could begin having your period at any time, it would be nearly impossible to predict when you ovulate for the first time, which means if you have sex during that time, you could get pregnant.

3. My friend says she only has sex during her period so she can’t get pregnant. Does that work?
You can get pregnant at any time of the month because you can ovulate at any time during your monthly cycle. Generally, women ovulate 10-14 days before the start of their period, but stress, illness, or other factors could cause a woman to ovulate at a different time during the month.

4. My boyfriend told me that if he pulls out before he ejaculates, I can’t get pregnant. Is that true?
Some sperm are released during pre-ejaculation, which occurs before ejaculation and cannot be controlled, or usually even felt. The sperm from pre-ejaculation can fertilize an egg in the same way sperm from ejaculation can.

5. Can you become pregnant if pre-ejaculate comes in contact with the vulva? What is the possibility? 
You can get pregnant in this situation. During sexual intercourse, almost all penises pre-ejaculate (leak fluid) before ejaculation. The pre-ejaculate is very concentrated with sperm and nutrients and can easily travel up the vagina and fertilize an egg after it comes in contact with the vulva (genital organs on the outside of a woman’s body). The chances of pregnancy are somewhat less than completely unprotected sex; however, it still is a possibility.

6. If my boyfriend and I take a bath together and he ejaculates in the water, can I become pregnant?
There is a very small chance you could get pregnant if your boyfriend ejaculates in the water next to you. If you are having intercourse or close touching even with penetration in the water there is a possibility of pregnancy.

7. What is the percentage of teenage mothers who drop out of school?
70% of teen mothers drop out of high school. 40,000 students drop out each year because of pregnancy.

8. What if you are still a virgin, but semen comes in contact with the vulva?
You can still get pregnant even if you have not had actual intercourse (penetration), if semen comes into contact with the vulva or surrounding areas.

9. I heard that you can have your period and still be pregnant. If that’s true, how many months can you have your period and be pregnant?
You can have what appears to be your period and still be pregnant. Some women have lighter than usual “periods” during the first few months of pregnancy, but they generally stop having them after the first 3-4 months. A normal period is a signal that your body is not pregnant.

10. I pulled out of my girlfriend before I ejaculated and we are scared that she is pregnant…can you tell me how we can find out if she is and what we can we do to stop the pregnancy if she is?
There is a chance she could be pregnant, since the pre-ejaculate fluid contains some sperm. If she is not already on birth control, she should strongly consider it. If she would like “emergency contraception,” there are combinations of birth control pills that will cause her to get a period. She can ask a provider at Planned Parenthood or another local family planning clinic.

11. If you have oral sex can you contract an STD?
Yes, many STDs can be passed through oral sex, especially gonorrhea and herpes. Chlamydia, syphilis, and genital warts can also be spread in this way. Remember, blisters or discharge does not have to be present to be able to contract an infection.

12. How many days before or after your period can you have sex with a less likely chance to get pregnant?
Typically, females ovulate 10-14 days before they start their periods. This is the most fertile time of the month. However, this is difficult to track as menstrual cycles tend to not be regular, and sperm can live in a woman’s body for 72 hours after ejaculation.

13. My boyfriend and I were kissing, with our clothes on, and I noticed a wet spot on my pants from where he ejaculated. Can sperm travel through his clothes and my clothes? Can I be pregnant?
Sperm is small, but it cannot travel through clothing such as jeans. It is possible for sperm to travel through cotton underwear, however.

14. I am now on birth control pills. My boyfriend and I had sex one day without protection and he pulled when he ejaculated. My period has come but it is lighter than my other periods. Could I be pregnant?
It is possible, though unlikely. Your period can change when you go on the pill, so that may account for the “lightness” of your last period. Remember your pill must be taken at the same time, everyday to be effective. You may want to consider using condoms as well. The Pill does not protect you from STDs, including HIV/AIDS.